A Guide to Gospel Conversations

There is an ancient Chinese proverb that goes like this: “He who waits for a roast duck to fly into his mouth must wait a very long time.” You can sit back, open your mouth, and hope that what you are craving will fly right in, but you will be waiting a long time.

Our evangelism in the church often looks exactly like that man, sitting back, isolating ourselves, and assuming that somehow the right gospel conversation is going to happen on its own. But that is not how it worked for any of us. If you are a Christian today, it is because somebody in your life took the time to share the gospel of Jesus Christ with you. Somebody engaged you. Now we are called as Christians to engage other people in gospel conversations so that they can come to know the same Jesus that we know.

Peter is writing to Christians who are in persecution, who are in crisis, and living in a place hostile to their faith. You might be in a hard season yourself right now, and you might think this is a time to put ministry on the back burner. In reality, this is a prime opportunity to share the reason for the hope that you have. That is what he means in 1 Peter 3:15: “But in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect.”

God is sovereign over salvation, but He works through means, and the means He has chosen is His people engaging in real gospel conversations with real unbelievers. By sharing how God has been sovereign in our trials, we can share the reason why our hope is constant despite our circumstances.

With Gentleness and Respect

Some people read “always being prepared to make a defense” and hear a call to arms. They are ready to out-argue anybody about the gospel. But Peter adds that qualifier for a reason. When somebody comes into a conversation ready to beat the other person down with the Bible they get defensive fast. People do not listen well when they are on the defense. The tone matters just as much as being ready in the first place.

Creating the Context

So how do gospel conversations happen? They start with being intentional. By the time most of us add up our church activities, our work, our family life, there is no margin left for relationships with people who do not know Jesus. I feel that conviction myself. I have said that between pastoring the church and everything else, I feel like I have little time left for people outside the church. Maybe you feel that too.

Here are a few practical ways you can be intentional in cultivating gospel conversations:

1. Eat with non-Christians.

Most people will say yes to lunch with a coworker or burgers with a neighbor, and that already sounds like friendship. Sharing meals together is an excellent way to get to know your neighbors and hear their stories. Think about all the times you have met with friends to get food or coffee. Food is the foundation for building relationships.

2. Walk your neighborhood instead of driving through it in a bubble.

This can be a good way to meet your neighbors or at the very least share a friendly “hello” with the people you pass by.

3. Be a “regular” somewhere, so the people around you get to know you.

That could be going to the same hairdresser, gym, or coffee shop. By showing up consistently, you can build relationships with people in your community.

4. Find ways to serve your neighbors.

My wife and I recently fixed a meal and showed up unannounced at a neighbor’s door who was going through a hard stretch. Their eyes filled with tears at what we brought them. And their hearts were open to conversation.

5. Once there is real relationship, ask about their story.

Everybody has one, and everybody loves telling it. Then tell your own. Take out the hubris, take out the pride, and just be a real person talking about what Jesus has meant to you in your trials. Spurgeon said: “Evangelism is one beggar telling another beggar where he found bread.” That only works if the one beggar has found it and is willing to share the source.

Pick one person this week, somebody whose name you know or want to know, and pray for them by name. Ask God to help you be a faithful witness to that person. Nobody’s duck has ever flown in on its own.